I come from Slovakia, a small country in the heart of Europe and I spent a major part of my life wandering in the mountains, forests and paddling the wild rivers and lakes. I never knew the real origin of my strong inner calling which constantly pulled me back outdoors and which I hardly ever could and wanted to resist. This passion however at my tender age undoubtedly took roots in my later evolved deep love of Mother Nature, of all the living creatures and of life itself. They became my only real companions and soul asylum for a long time.
I guess it was for the third time when the same scenario repeated in my life in 2010 – I was not capable to bear up the constraints of the modern society’s type of life anymore. I draw the line at everything once again and I left into Canadian wilderness for something that I don’t know to name other than “call of the spirit”. That time I managed to come back again. The fear which we all carry within us from our birth and which the modern lifestyle continuously strengthen in us was still greater than the life calling for itself. When it happened again three years later, I could not and above all, I didn’t want to say No to life again. Maybe because of my decision to not run away, the energy accumulated inside the body manifested in a completely different way – in my poor health condition. This time life pushed me right into the corner and somehow I realized that there’s no escape anymore.
After a period of attending the medical specialists without any apparent outcome, I went in a different way. With help from a few people, to whom I am really grateful, I was able to stabilize my physical body. But the real importance of all that happened during those times I understood much later.
A longtime inner need for fulfillment, fighting with the emptiness of modern society’s values and a desire to find the way to a meaningful life as a part of it, without a need to isolate myself from the society or continuously run away into the wilderness to “clear the head” and calm down the soul, finally led me to Dr. Wilfried Nelles, to his new constellation format – the Life Integration Process (LIP) and phenomenology. At that time I knew Wilfried Nelles only as the author of books, which I encountered by coincidence and were very close to me in terms of philosophy, life values and thoughts. And I had a personal experience with family constellations.
What I had seen when Wilfried Nelles made me my first LIP completely changed my life. I had a chance to see what I already felt for many years – my own self in particular phases of my life. That I’m not looking at my past but at my current relationship to the past, I didn’t know at that time. However, that was the first time in my life when I was capable of looking at it exactly as it happened. Within seconds everything clicked into place and began to make sense. And with that realization, all stress, tension and internal uncertainty began to subside.
At that moment I knew – and later I was able to accept – that everything in our life was meant to happen and is still happening exactly as it is meant to happen. That everything is right exactly as it is and that life is all the time just a manifestation of our own potential. Of something, what we came into this world for – and what many call “the life purpose”. That we are who we are and we can never change who we are – we only can accept that. Consequently, we have exactly what we, deep down, want to have in life. We have it – because of who we are. And so everything that happened was meant to happen. It was required – to enable us to become who we are.
At the moment we will be able and ready to acknowledge and accept this, we will also see and realize that life itself is this purpose. And that what is happening in our life is not based on our deliberate intentions nor the environment we come from (our original family, ancestor’s lineage or society). It’s driven exclusively by the fact of WHO WE ARE – from the very beginning. Under the condition that we follow our heart.
It was the day when I understood that I have not seen anything so powerful as the LIP method ever before. Deeply authentic and getting to the very roots of our suffering. I also realized that this revelation is what I was waiting for, for such a long time – and that my sensibility is something I am meant to live with. For life does not unfold based on what we want, but based on what’s required, for the Whole – and its growth. And actually, deep inside of us – that’s exactly what we want.
