In recent time I’ve been contacted by a few people who were having some hard times facing what life brings. Namely physical pain in various parts of the body, disorientation, mental anxiety, feelings of being lost, ungrounded, becoming very sensitive to the living environment and with a major loss of borders in connection to other people. Most of these cases preceded a global pandemic breakout from the last few weeks.
It very much reminded me of the experiences I went through at some point in the past. I was going across some integration phase which manifested outwardly in a very uncomfortable living and health conditions. I was simply experiencing some hard times. Mentally, emotionally but mainly physically. For months I’ve had pains all over the body of various intensities. Weird, powerful energetical currents were passing through my body. Once I was freezing and my feet were totally cold. The other moment my feet and head were burning. I had serious digestion issues and the immune system wasn’t able to catch up with the pace anymore. The feelings of fear and grief were changing with the ones of horrification and anger. My mind was getting crazy and I wasn’t able to focus on anything. And then a week or two before I took certain decisive actions, some kind of heaviness was pulling me down to Earth with such a power that I could hardly stand on my feet and walk.
It took several months until I got beyond and found myself in a bit more stabilised condition again. I guess that what kept me going and at the edge of falling into insanity was my utter trust in life and its rhythms. Along with a deep inner knowing that we are all individually as well as collectively undergoing an important inner transformation leading to eventual transcendence. And that if we can see the light hidden inside of the darkness, it might be a tremendous opportunity to grow.
When the coronavirus pandemic slowly started to expand into the European countries, I was already abroad again. Focused on a new job and with only occasional contact with my family back home. But at one of the evenings, I received a short message from my Mother, as a response to our conversation. And the last sentence took my attention. She said: “Rather don’t travel at the moment, schools are being closed here, hospitals and other institutions, the corona virus is ruling here. Take care“…
That was the first time when I saw the name of the novel virus, causing “COVID-19” disease written in two separate words instead of just one. I knew that somehow it’s important and the rest will come later. The insight came before going to bed, but it has been “cooked” for some time. The core message of the “new problem of humanity” (which always lies behind the problem) came suddenly and with clarity. Humanity has received a humble invitation with a very clear content: ”Turn back, bend on your knees and pray for forgiveness”.
In the words of Tradition, “It’s time to commence the marriages with the Mother”. Time to start embodying. We are slowly transcending into a new paradigm. And this transition phase leads us on a path to psychological adulthood. We are being asked to break-out from the co-dependent relationship to our mother and step on our path while standing on our own feet. No wonder that the virus causing the new pandemic originated in China and that the most affected countries worldwide are (besides China) Italy, France, Spain, Germany and Iran. The interestingly resonating name of the disease caused by it, COVID-19 speaks of itself. When you look for the archetypal meaning of the 19th Gene Key you might get a point more clearly. The emotional co-dependence on the mother. From which the only way out is embracing “death” and then, over time, learn how to “die daily”. For the beginning, we are asked to face one of our deepest fears – the fear of death. Fear of annihilation. And we could perhaps all start by contemplating the topic of Forgiveness and its connection to the integration of our past. Collectively as well as individually.
That our primal collective response to the current situation is the one of “total control” is another story. It’s an organic evolutionary phase and the reaction of the mind, of the adolescent consciousness we live in. In which we are – instead of facing the problem and digging out the light from its source by integrating the root cause – trying to “get it under the control”. Any problem we face as humanity nowadays, what we do as first is trying to “fix it” as soon as we can. Trying to “get rid of it”, to brush it off underneath the carpet or simply to mentally think up the way out. Instead of unconditionally feeling the consequences of the issue – to resolve it once and forever. In other words to integrate it.
And so we have found ourselves in the global movement towards the “sterile society”, in which the sterile and empty adolescent consciousness is lost. We are getting crazy to disinfect everything and we have found a new enemy – viruses. Which we, in our unconsciousness, believe are the source of all our health issues and the world coronavirus pandemic. This unconscious reaction is a great excuse serving to avoid the truth of how we authentically feel underneath the surface. But above all, a distraction from the fact that we, in truth, want to disinfect and clean out ourselves – our bodies and our hearts. From the heaviness and baggage of our past and the past of our ancestors. So we can finally move forward, towards the future.
We are all standing in front of a huge opportunity. Collectively as well as individually. The opportunity to integrate the past.
Of course, it won’t be so simple to cross the barrier of fear and victimisation. For most of us, it’s easier to escape into the illusionary mental realm. Into the artificial safety of a dreamy world, we constantly make up in our minds. Like the one from my friend’s message from yesterday: “If I tune myself to the third eye, to the Universe, then there is all fine. But once I am down I have to be resolving people and emotions and I got into discomfort. And so the best is to keep the higher vibration, for my safety and a general spiritual comfort”.
Well, to get out of our heads is not an easy task…
The amount of fear which is surfacing for integration, because it’s been triggered by the current happenings in the world, is tremendous. And the more repressive, addictive and distractive natures we are, the more fear is surfacing from within. The fear for generations suppressed inside the physical bodies by us and all our ancestors. It’s all there. And constantly more being accumulated as we are unwilling to face it. It’s our personal and collective “heritage”. Waiting to be taken care of.
Nevertheless, sooner or later we will inevitably end up in front of the only solution for what is awaiting us as a society and also individually in these turbulent times. In front of embodiment. As this is what is required of us all.
The “embodiment” is a long term process. It’s nothing but a journey of grounding the awareness away from the mental realm, from our heads back into the physical body. Of grounding the high frequencies into our everyday life and integrating them as part of our human nature. Or we can also approach it the other way around – which is to say that the embodiment is an integration of the low-frequency aspects of our human nature. So that we can come back into society and live a fulfilled and prosperous life. Without cutting ourselves off from others, from the temptations of every day’s realm or endlessly running away from the pain the world “is causing” us.
It’s about embracing the pain and suffering of this world. A deep dive directly into the suffering – so that we can eventually liberate ourselves from it and find peace with ourselves and others. Because it’s not the suffering of the world which makes us anxious and uncomfortable. But rather our lack of acceptance and thus attachment to discomfort and pain that makes us suffer.
It’s a process of harmonising and bringing our energies back into balance once again. And that especially applies after going through the so-called “spiritual” experiences (or high-frequency moments) of which the purpose is, paradoxically, to detach the awareness from the body. However, to authentically detach the awareness from the body we first have to fully penetrate the physical body and integrate all the residual ancient memories which cause our attachments to it. It mostly includes non-doing activities but can also contain a lot of hard work or physical exertion. It includes and transcends, invites and allows.
Our quest for happiness must’ve come to an end one day. All things eventually come full circle. And it seems that it’s currently happening also collectively.
I was looking for a job recently. I never thought that it would happen again after I went on the journey of self-employment, but I was probably wrong. Anyway, that’s what is here now, at this moment.
But what I want to share is one insight into the topic of “the quest for a purpose and happiness”, based on my own experience and as a part of my personal journey:
My whole professional career was for more than 15 years closely interconnected with the field of Information Technologies. I have spent those years in many different types of consulting positions and companies of various sizes. As an employee and also a contractor. All these experiences brought to me countless opportunities to gain a wider perspective of the field as well as of people and processes involved. In the last few years I have extended my path into the area of “personal development and consulting” – and naturally moved closer towards people rather than technologies and systems only.
But as I got to know myself more and more, not excluded just to the professional area, at some point I realized that whatever job, position, project or company we currently work at, it is always the very same set of skills manifesting on the outside. Regardless of the form that our abilities take. Whether we work as a gardener, IT consultant, company director or a spiritual teacher is of less importance. The inner symbolism of our role is always the very same.
For me its consultancy. I observe, gather information, analyse them and then I propose the change, solution or product which enable the subject to move forward or grow. This is who I am, what I do and what I love – and I could never possibly be doing anything else.
And all the quest for “true purpose” and happiness? Well, like many others I also experienced that the notion of your “life purpose” has not much to do with your outer activities. It’s not about your job, social role, business vision, professional or “spiritual” role or task to fulfil. YOU are the purpose. It’s been set up long before your birth and you can never change it.
But you still need to embody that purpose…